We think we all know the story of Cinderella and the cruel stepsisters. But a recent discovery of a bound folio of handwritten papers in a castle in Bavaria casts new light on the Brothers Grimm’s story collecting, and their editorial interventions. We’re delighted to be able to present here, for the first time, the recently transcribed documents.
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Dear Angelica and Frederica,
As promised, please find a complimentary contributor copy of our book enclosed.
I do hope you understand when you see that we have taken a few modest liberties with your story.
We thank you for your many kindnesses.
Warmest regards,
Jacob Grimm
***
Frederica’s Diary,
The Book has arrived and, I must say, Jelly is furious.
She says she will write to papa’s lawyer.
And she has sent Ella a note too.
***
Dear Jelly,
l can see why you’re annoyed. OK. But Charms says there’s no such thing as bad publicity, so maybe grin and bear it, ya?
Love you.
Ella XOX
***
Dear Messrs. Grimm,
I remain astonished. Not only did we offer you utterly unfettered access to our hearth and home, but also to our hearts. Gentlemen, if you are worthy of the name, I must say it is badly done.
You shall be hearing from our lawyer.
Sincerely,
Angelica de Baron
***
HAVE INSTRUCTED SPOON STOP VARIOUS UNNAMED PRINCES INCENSED STOP NUMEROUS STEP-MOTHERS WITCHES AND OVERLOOKED FAIRY-GODMOTHERS INVOLVED STOP SEX DISCRIMINATION CASE POSSIBLY PURSUABLE STOP LOVE PAPA
***
Frederica’s Diary,
The Grimm brothers, as Jelly says we must now call them, have sent a conciliatory box of chocolates and a bouquet.
Jelly says we should return them, but has her eye on the most sinful salted caramel. And I notice she has put the flowers in water. Except for one. Which she has pressed.
***
Dear Grimms,
The gifts are beautiful. Thank you. But you must know that nothing can compensate for the damage that has been done to our reputation.
Yours,
Angelica de Baron
PS We are keeping the bouquet.
PPS Those caramels? Divine.
PPPS Still not mollified.
***
Dear Angelica and Frederica,
We are most sincerely sorry, we have over-reached the fertility of our oft-times too fertile imaginations and have unintentionally hurt you most indelicately.
Would a retraction and public apology satisfy you? And possibly a share in the sales? It is what your Mr. Spoon suggests.
Yours,
Jacob Grimm.
PS I agree about the caramels, though Wilhelm prefers the nut cluster.
***
Frederica’s Diary,
They’ve now sent the most enormous hamper!
Jacob also enclosed a note which Jelly hid. She was rather pink cheeked, so I’m afraid that I must draw my own conclusions.
I have seen her writing late at night. It is most frustrating. She has burned all her discards. AND the blotting paper. It is almost as though she thinks I cannot be trusted!
***
ALL SATISFACTORILY CONCLUDED COMMA SPOON HAS THE CONTRACT STOP BOOK IS STARTLINGLY GOOD ON REVENGE COMMA SUGGEST CLOSE READING STOP LOVE PAPA
***
Frederica’s Diary,
We have read The Book from cover to cover. It’s awfully good. Though I can see what Mr. Spoon means about the Stiltskins and various princes whose names have been carefully omitted.
I think The Book is right, revenge does seem to be a dish best served cold, but, Jelly says to live well is better still.
Personally, I think this involves hampers. And maybe new fans. Or a dress.
Jelly is still writing. It is not impossible she is up to something complicated and potentially vexatious.
***
The de Barons
Are invited to the Christmas Ball
Love, Cinderella and Charming
PS The brothers are coming!!! So you better!!!
PPS There’s going to be a chocolate fountain ????
***
Frederica’s Diary,
OH MY GOODNESS!!!! Jelly and Jacob are engaged!!
It is most unexpected even though I saw Charming exchange a hearty wink with him earlier in the evening.
I have been promised a new dress of green silk and a matching fan.
***
Dear Jelly,
Charming had a long chat with Jacob and says Hamper-Boy thinks this was all his idea? You always were the clever one! First you sort Charms out for me and now this? Happily ever afters all round! Ya!?!!
Love,
Ella xxxxx
PS Fred says there’s chocolate? Dibs on the strawberry creams.
***
Frederica’s Diary,
Apparently this has all been a ploy. Jelly says it’s best to get your revenge in first and planned everything from the moment she laid eyes on Jacob.
And she didn’t even tell me!
But I’ve decided it’s pointless being cross. After all Jacob has promised a festive hamper and more chocolate, and possibly a kitten.
When Jelly told Papa he laughed and reminded us that actually revenge is sweet.
And with all this chocolate it certainly will be.